Transcript: An Unexpected Guest

HARRY: I'm going on a date with Jenna. She’s so sweet! Hello. Oh, hi Harley. Really? That's terrible. Well, sure. You can stay here. Sure, see you soon.

That was my cousin Harley from Hollywood. He’s passing through town and he lost his wallet with all his money. I better make sure I have enough money for tonight.

Flowers $10, chocolates $8, 2 dinners $20 each, that’s $40, $14 for desserts for both of us, $12 for tax and tip, $16 for taxis. If I stay on budget, this’ll be a perfect date.

Hey Harley, how, how you doin'?

HARLEY: What a miserable day. First, my plane was late. Then, the guy next to me snored the entire flight. Then, I lost my wallet!

HARRY: Just relax, watch some TV, and I'll see you later.

HARLEY: Where you going?

HARRY: Out to a restaurant called The New Leaf

HARLEY: I’m going with you.

HARRY: Oh, uh, but you see, Jenna and I had a date, and…

HARLEY: Come on, it’ll be fun! Let's go.

HARRY: Ok.

HARLEY: And then, after the awards, I went to this wonderful party. All the biggest stars were there… Leonardo, Amanda… I danced with Hillary. She's very sweet.

JENNA: I'll have the pasta primavera.

HARRY: Jenna's meal is $10 ---that’s $10 less than I budgeted.

HARLEY: I'll have the steak.

HARRY: Great! His dinner is $25! If I want to stay on budget, I can only spend $5 for my dinner. Can I please get a grilled cheese sandwich? Thanks.

WAITER: Dessert?

JENNA: I’ll have the crème brulee, please.

HARRY: Jenna’s dessert is $10. If I'm going to stay on budget, there's only $4 left for one more dessert.

HARLEY: I’ll have the--

HARRY: Excuse us. Look, when I ask you if you want a dessert just say no, got it? One crème brulee, I'll have the rice pudding and, Harley, what will you have?

HARLEY: Nothing for me.

HARRY: Oh, are you sure? Uh, the desserts are really great.

HARLEY: Okay, I’ll have rice pudding, too.

HARRY: If you order dessert, I won’t have enough money, so just say no, got it?

HARLEY: Sorry, my bad.

HARRY: I'll have the rice pudding. And, Harley, what will you have?

HARLEY: Nothing.

HARRY: Are you sure? Positive?

HARLEY: Well, I…Nothing for me

HARRY: Harley, would you like half of my dessert? I’m right on budget, with just enough money for a taxi. You know I only offered you half.

HARLEY But my half was on the bottom.

HARLEY: So, you know, it really begs the question, why wear a Rolex, when you can have a Cartier, right? I mean this thing is custom-made, diamond-encrusted. It’s beautiful, really, you gotta see it…

HARRY: Jenna!

HARLEY: Hey, what about me?

HARRY: Sorry, my bad.